Sunday, November 25, 2007

Saturday night

Saturday should be a happy day, but i just couldn't find my happy. Aside from fever, headache, cough and runny nose, the man preferred to add more salt to my wound. :(

We went out to park at late evening, a short walk before we headed to our dinner. When Jo was happily playing there, the man said "big eyes, messy hair, what's the look here", fine, just try not to bother what he said since i didn't want to spoil my mood. Then came to dinner, he gave me another irritating look when i asking him what he preferred to eat, he looked extremely impatient and said "this you can't eat, that you can't eat, i don't know what you want to eat, you just order la..", well, i know my allergy really brings me a lot of inconvenience, but what to do. When comes to night, i was the one who suffered. So, i just ordered some simple dishes and the whole dinner we didn't talk much. No quarrel, just have the feeling like "i am quite a tow-sui-ga, make him no face", you know, when last time i was about the same time going down with him, he would keep a distance from me and trying not to let his colleagues saw me, or, he would go down earlier or later, in short, he just trying not to go down with me at the same time. So, after few incidents, i just trying not to go out with him at the same time, if he felt like i would "tow-sui" him, then no matter what i do also would like "tow-sui" him.

At night, we had quarrel, as he wanted to go out at midnight, ya, it's almost midnight, i asked him don't go out but he said i was very inconsiderate, he said man should go out more often in order to benefit his work, gosh, going to pub, disco, karaoke and pool can benefit his work?? Why don't he simplify the word and tell me he prefers outside lady more than me?? Then i cried...cried until i felt like there was one hitting my head, just felt my head was very very pain, and i didn't know what time i stop crying and dozed off...That's a Saturday night, cried, sick, and nobody wanted to care with me.

And, today is his birthday, no celebration, no cake and we even not talking. If he talks to me, i think i will forgive him, but he just doesn't care my feeling as he is enjoying his movie now. A wife for him only he would want me when he needs me, when he doesn't need me, i am as cheap as rubbish.

19 comments:

Elaine said...

Hey Hui Sia, cheer up... tell you what...I'm a little depress with hubby too..coz he left me alone at home and go enjoy himself on our annivesary and he forgot my birthday. I also never talk to him. 6th year liao.. like no more romance. Try to cheer myself up by just looking at my pretty lynn.

Blur Angel said...

sayang sayang HUiSia...:) just try not to think bout it, u need to stay strong for both Elijah And JO! Anytime, just give me a buzz if u feel like talking okie?

Jacelyn Chew said...

really sorry to hear that, dear friend. this really makes me think of my situation but maybe not to that situation. anyway, let both of u cool down first and have a nice talk. maybe something is bothering him too, i mean his work? just dunno why, after marriage sure must have great difference with those days before marriage! i'm always left alone too. married but like no hubby....anyway, u still have us to share and care. cheer up, friend!

misha's mum said...

hmmmm .... what I can say is be strong ok?

Anything give me a call ok? You got my number right ?

PapaJoneh said...

my friend Huisia.. I feel the pain. Yes I do. Especially when you're sick. I cannot comment on his attitude or behavior for I am no angel too.
Just be strong Huisia. I know its hard. Its easy for me to say ... but just hang on there for your two lovely boys. If you want to talk as a friend, just buzz me. Or my wife is always there - you know where to find us.
and of course, take good care of your health. Maybe we've been hit by this sickness at the same time. Hope you get well, SOON.

Joanne said...

Hi Hui Sia, don't be so upset. Think of the bright side, could be your hubby face some problem with his work and he doesn't know how to share it with you, thus, he let go his feeling in the wrong way on you. Sometimes, we cann't set high expectation on our hubby, before and after married, the way they treated us are different; also, before and after have kids, they also treat us differently.Sigh.

No matter what, you still have 2 little sweeties to cheer you up, they need you to take care of them.

Health Freak Mommy said...

Yes cheer up Hui Sia! Most husbands are like that, mine too sometimes. Try to talk to him first lor, i know it's hard, i hate to do that too but we hv every bit to loose if our man goes and 'kuang'. So sigh.... just talk to him first and settle this dispute asap. I wish u luck and do update us yah! *hugs*

etceteramommy said...

HuiSia... If I read him correctly, he's probably too engrossed in life without a wife, kids around him. You know.. chinese say 'mo wong koon'. So you hang in there. I'm sure he will get used and start to enjoy having his family with him. As for his sarcastic remarks.. mo lei hui. Importantly you feel good about yourself and you should really pamper yourself more. Be a vain pot! :D

Anonymous said...

Hui Sia,
Be strong.Men and Woman are always not equal, not matter what esp Asians. I find that sometimes non-working woman are more pathetic as the men are taking the woman has to rely on him totally. Somemore, there are so many pretty women in China. Therefore, you have to make yourself look good so that he won't think you r "wong min po", to show him a SAHM can also be presentable. Did you find any nanny to help you there? May be you can find some time to take up a hobby or something.

Michelle said...

what i wanted to say, has been said by others. i just blog about why god allows suffering. i know that this is a trying time for you. but this is also a time that will make you into a stronger woman, a stronger mother. hold on tight to God and His promises and pray for strength and wisdom. I believe that He will see you through. Just commit your husband and your marriage to God, let Him worry. He brought both of you together, he knows better how to fix this. :)

msaufong said...

Man are too careless, sometimes they just don't know how to think from our side. Don't think much, rest more and be a happy mama to your boys. Hope you feel better today.

TheBlueRanger said...

there will always be ups and downs in a relationship. so, hang in there. probably he is pressured by his work? regarding his remark on you....'apa lagi' pamper yourself and if he ever question you, tell him it's bcoz of what he said lar

Sasha said...

hey, he is just going through a bad time la and he did the wrong thing that is to take it out on you. So you hang in there la. every family also got own problem. U see me good i see you good. Remember that . SMILE ya..be a happy mama for yr kids!

mama of 2LittleFellas said...

altho i'm not sure what's bothering him that makes him behave in such manner but i think no matter what, he shouldn't treat you this way. especially when you are sick and tired from taking care of the kids.

however, he is your husband and father to your children, you need to talk to him to work things out. find an opportune time when he is in a better mood for a heart to heart talk to resolve whatever tension that is building up in your marriage.

in the meantime, cheer up and start feeling good about yourself. self-confidence comes from within first. you have been nothing but a great wife and mama to your kids. so, don't think any less of yourself.

laundryamah said...

oh gosh! how can the man be so inconsiderate one..hang in there...

L B said...

That is so horrible! *sigh*

I believe that the person you marry MUST be the person you really love. Good & bad times will happen. The important thing is the love. With love, all the bad times won't be so bad, and all the good times will be so good.. *sigh*

Man and Woman, can't live without them, Can't live with them..

Mommy to Chumsy said...

hey hui sia, sorry to hear about this. it's not right for him to say such things to you. you have every right to be angry. unfortunately, sometimes men think that just because they are the ones bringing back the bacon, they have every right to treat their wives like that.

It's best that you talk it over with him rather than keeping this inside you. Tell him how hurt you are by his words. It's not easy being a SAHM with 2 kids to take care. Take care of yourself ok?

kelly said...

Very sorry to hear that... I think you and your hubby need to sit down and have a good talk. There are things that need straightening out between you two. Cheer up and take care!

JO-N said...

How are you feeling Hui Sia? Hmm...Don't worry too much. Maybe you should treat him as a friend instead of a husband. That's what I always tell myself too. If my friend do this to me, I won't feel as hurt as when my hubby do this to me. Look around you, you have so many friends who are willing to listen if you want to talk about it. Be strong for your two boys.